1 Peter 3:7. [redacted] said the next morning Jamin made her wear a turtle neck to church so nobody would see the bruises. He is very particular about how he runs his household, his likes and dislikes. Either they think you are into some sort of kinky lifestyle or they think you are a mindless doormat. Role playing, for starters, is spouses pretending theyre someone elseOK, isnt that adulterous in its intent? (I dont have much time or interest right now to go through and read all comments left to me since I last was here, or comment on them all.) So anyway, of course God gives our husband and other authority persons who have our husbands permission to punish us. and going through Judges 4:9 all the way to Eph 5:23 and 1Tim 2:12). Its not just me that talks about your husband having authority, Julie Anne. I debated putting this in the Godly ladies' thread but decided that I would risk my reputation to be thought of as forward because this is just too good to keep from men. Isnt bullying between two consenting children? It seems like my husbands leadership skills have developed so strongly. It contains articles on spanking in marriage, as well as advice on leading the home. Another thing to bear in mind is that all Domestic Violence services are underfunded so the workers are vevy busy. Junia was a female apostle who taught men. Wacky science isnt fooling anyone, even if people are not always able to verbalize it, they feel within themselves that something is wrong and this autism makes them explode at some point. This is your warning. So when my husband spanked me the first time, I was embarrassed, but I thought maybe it was my fault or somehow it was OK. . I cannot begin to identify with you in your suffering. Your testimonial will be added to this blog so that other people can benefit from and be inspired by your experiences with Christian Domestic Discipline. Yet you call yourself a child. So if not understanding DD is not understanding justice then you are already acknowledging that DD is non-consensual. No fool in his right mind would buy this as a legitimate way to have a relationship, Alsdurf says. ), Lone Voice says, A Husbands Guide to Implementing Christian Domestic Discipline. There are high security refuges for women such as your friend, and some women do indeed change their identity to make it difficult for their abusers to track them down. Its not just me that talks about your husband having authority, Julie Anne. Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. No one is tricked or trapped into that, even if you seem to have the concerning desire to save people from themselves because it just cant be right. There are millions of non christians practicing domestic discipline, and millions of Christians practicing it too. Have a great day. In an abusive home, children do not have a sense of a normal healthy marriage, so thismodeling of abusive behaviorcould affect generations. It doesnt matter if millions of legitimate lives deviating from the average are frustrated and destroyed in the process, these are just data points). Ive been exploring submission for some time, and the one thing that I have discovered above anything else is the fact that wifely submission brings harmony to a home. Try a bit of balance, do. For instance, those who practice domestic discipline often cite scripture that calls for wives to submit to their husbands. But if some Christians decide a little S&M is good for them? The article was popular with over 600 comments. And with those words, The Lone Voice Show is over and Spiritual Sounding Board returns in its channel and time slot. My husband tells me all the time how proud he is of the woman I have become. Wife Undermines Her Husbands Authority in Front of Children, He DisciplinesHer? Yes, Its true. Domestic Discipline and the Bible Although defenders of domestic discipline argue that their lifestyle is biblically-based, many Christian religious leaders disagree. Deborah cursed Barak for not taking his proper male role, and the Apostle Paul, knowing all about Junia, still says a woman may not usurp authority over a man. You are, by your writing, an intelligent adult. Carry on. I did go back and find the entire 700 club episode from that day and InContext it was very understandable. The best part of domestic discipline is what has happened emotionally between this long-time married couple. Male headship is followed all over the world. When the man takes charge and makes really good, well-thought-out (and prayed for) decisions, its pretty easy for wives to submit. As far as your point is made. You simply cannot say that as the visitors at my site are widely diverse. Sometimes Ben thinks I need to be spanked everyday, when I forget that I am supposed to be the submissive one. I would however disagree with the notion that these laws were well-inspired. I love how men take 2 verses in Genesis and squelch women for all of eternity. Founded in 2010, Thought Catalog is owned and operated by The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. For over a decade, we've been at the bleeding edge of media, pioneering an infrastructure for creatives to flourish both artistically and financially. During this time my behavior, and our marriage improved through my daily spanking, but Ben was lacking in giving me spankings when I misbehaved, something I tearfully confessed during one of our meetings. Would Jesus (bad word) the church against the churches will? The patriarchy guys, like whats his name, Doug Whats-It? 100pinkapples: I am so sorry you have been so badly treated. This new 3-part podcast series is not a like any of my previous writings on the subject of Domestic Discipline. You just posted most of my rapist and fathers favorite bible verses. Mark 11:26 But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses. General: Dont like scripture when it disagrees with your prejudices, you guys, do you? He absolutely WILL be back. I cant support you in that. Plausible? I can also say , please sir may I go to bed without my nightgown and thats me asking to be intimate, Ben almost always says yes. Watts' first-hand experience of Fundamentalist Christian male dominance is pretty sobering. And then after that we will spend several articles looking at cultural views of domestic discipline in America before the modern age. And the part of the body does not change it from abuse to discipline if you were to grab a stranger and hit him on the bottom, youd be up for assault charges. But just like a chocolate addict will eat carob in moments of dire necessity. I can see from your posts that you have major issues with men, Some men are sexist, selfish, or abusive pigs. However be prepared because I do no think this movement is going anywhere. [redacted] said Jamin is very controlling. I found out that the Pastor spoke to her husband and so he had the pastor and his wife come over for dinner and then told her the pastor talked to him about her attitude and she was getting a spanking after dinner. If you are really interested in having an informed opinion, a good starting point would be to search getting started with domestic discipline on the internet. I take it that you are a man pretending to be a woman. I never heard or suspected anything growing up. No-one ever gives a better interpretation, they just holler at me as if the one who shouts loudest must be right. A Husbands Guide to Implementing Christian Domestic Discipline. Im giving this to couple famous authors who write books on abuse and see what they want to do with (one has Radio)! Its not right. Very interested in the resources available to wives repeatedly forced to accept this unspeakable treatment. The point is that whenever we are in a tough spot, I always emphasize that its whatever he decides and he knows that. Julie Anne asks, What does Er. mean? Its the soft and fading, though somewhat prolonged, sound of brain flatulence. Im very grateful to Lauren for her e-mailand being willing to shed more light into this abusive practice so that we can have more understanding of what she and many others are going through. People practicing Domestic Discipline are typically very mature and proactive people who really think through these aspects of their relationship. In light of this typical new customer journey, I think its reasonable to suggest that people choosing this lifestyle put much more thinking into their relationships and are more intellectually alert than the average person going the default way. Keep asking, keeping phoning, keep knocking on doors. As a man and a Christian myself, I think all Christians need to listen to these stories. I know its hard, but it must be do-able by the grace of God and the power of Holy Spirit because our Lord Jesus said: I think there were many times two which I was so disobedient that my parents would have not known what to do unless they had given me a spanking and set me straight. Please go and speak to a pastor in a completely different church from the one they were in (I should recommend a sister in a Pentecostal church, but thats just my personal suggestion) and I know you will get more than a sympathetic ear. YOU are calling domestic discipline justice. JULY 1, 2015 @ 8:50 AM There are in fact right wingers and conservative Christians who take the Bible literally yet who also reject the gender complementarian position (which is what you are advocating). The Bible says I must obey my husband in all things, our minister always repeats this in our bible study. He has already had too much of your life. Example please? My husband was referred to your website awhile ago and presented me with this lifestyle. Women get to be slaves for men, while men lounge about reading their bibles trying to find bible verses that support their new sadistic fetishes to heap on their wives and children. I feel that, for our lonely wolfs sake, I might need to point out that flatulence is the polite term for the F word that rhymes with art. We were (and still are) a very young couple and both of our families had faith in our relationship. Lets keep working on putting a stop to it. I can remember being a little girl (probably middle school age) and hearing someone tell me the Scripture in Ephesians that calls women to submit to their husbands. Get the joke now? But over it all was always this sense of control and he was the man. My wedding vows included a vow to obey and he would often remind me that God commanded wives to submit and obey their husbands as they were supposed to do towards Christ. I am therefore by no mean the spokeman of everything thats being done under the sun (and couldnt even if I wanted it). Its brilliant. Anger is not sin, although we can sin in our anger. I have come to believe that there was a form of CDD/DD in the days of the bible. Moreover, God created us in his image, and I dont see you can claim that beating the image of God is okay because its supposedly consensual. We are commanded to submit to them. God told the Israelites to pass laws and enforce them. Go back to the word (Luke 4:1-13) and see for yourself. Really? Right now, you are in a state of intellectual intolerance that you try to justify by invoking science. Michael is worried sick over his wife's whereabouts, and he's determined to put a stop to her irresponsible behavior. Your brand of Christianity, which insists on male rulership, is just like Islam and Mormonism. These women are most of the time mature, mentally strong and educated. Im over 40 years of age and in charge of my own life. I had another thought about thetransfer of headship in marriage. that. Christian Domestic Discipline / Spencer Respect and Submission in domestic discipline Respect and Submission are of particular importance in a marriage because the standard marriage vows for the bride always included the phrase to love, honor and obey her husband. The church needs to know this is going on. Similarly, abusing men need to be taken to task (no, I dont know how, and in some cases they just never will be) but the fact of their existence does not mean God was wrong to say that the man is the head of the wife and that he shall rule over thee. James truly believed in Here are some tidbits of the arrest report: [redacted] told me Jamin has a couple of different hunting rifles, a couple of shot guns, a Glock pistol and another silver pistol. So I would not use such laws as legitimate precedents for anything either. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. Nope, A Lone Voice, Im not going there with you. English Common Law said that wives were the property of their husbands. I would love to know what demonization that church is. If you get to the point were you are ready to prevent two contenting adults from living the way they choose, you are making a big disservice to any cause you pretend to serve. And what did that one do while he was seeking a godly offspring? Im arguing that the word discipline entails a superior/inferior relationship and therefore not true consent. The call to statistics to justify that since it has to be abusive most of the time, it would be better to simply outlaw it. Many people even literally proceed in the manner I have just described. We did not get spanked very much nor did Mom because we knew better than disobey dad. I was in such a relationship for a while. What kinds of reactions can he expect from his wife as he introduces this into his marriage and how should he respond to his wifes reactions? One of Jamin and [redacted] counselors put software on Jamins computer that would not allow him to access pornographic sites. 13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. If some of them change their mind at some point, this is ok, but their testimonies do not make the lifestyle an abuse. Men ruling over women was a result of the fall, of sin entering humanity it was never Gods intent. (the link to their blog is currently on the upper left hand side of the page): When you first commented on here, I was prepared to hear you out I know someone personally who has fetishes, and hes admitted to me that can be a struggle for him in his marriage. Even the words used I think make some women question whether it is wrong or not. And do you realize that labelling people as abusers is a very serious and insulting thing to do ? Yes, guys, best leave 100PinkApples raging away because it suits your purpose better to have her stay unforgiving and bitter. Its because sje disrespected me. These testimonials are arranged in reverse order, with the most recent one first. Gen 2:23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Personal attacks are not. If adults have the right to spank those who disagree with them, well, I shudder to think of all the spank-fests thatd happen on every count; in every church meeting, every work-place. I think youd be surprised at how educated these people are. He preyed on his teen age nanny girl! Sorry Daisy, I forgot. Of course I think she deserved to get punished for complaining but I still felt bad for her. If you are currently living (or have lived) the Christian Domestic Discipline lifestyle and you would like to share how it has helped your marriage or relationship, please email your story and mention that you wish to share your experiences with other people. 15 reasons why Christian domestic discipline is a terrible, anti-Christian idea | Biblical Personhood, http://cryingoutforjustice.com/resources/hotlines/, http://cryingoutforjustice.com/resources/safety-planning/. Uh oh. I do not and will not oblige him in his depravity. And I also do not agree with her getting spanked in front of others. Our opinions dont matter when our husbands spanks us. Most jobs that could provide a living were male occupations. Because of his behavior with no rage, just an expectancy of needing to control you, it makes me think this was normal within his background or upbringing. It is not for you to determine someones path of recovery. It seems that both of these components make it much more likely for a woman to be the victim of domestic violence/wife spanking. Yet I was expected to call him sir at all times and I was often addressed as young lady or little girl, which was a constant put-down that made me feel small and powerless. Beyond praying for their victims, and calling the police in instances where we have knowledge of actual abuse, there is nothing we can do or say that will make a difference. At first Ben was not consistent, and didnt spank me nearly hard enough. And no, the experiences, however bad, do not nullify the word of God. :o). You are going to have to move to a place of forgiveness. Lets treat adults like adult and lets avoid the temptation of playing the role of God. You do not understand what you are attacking. What was it like in my Patriarchal home, you ask? She really messed up questioning her husbands leadership, our Minister said at Bible study that this had to mean a good spanking or other wives might think they had the right to do this, Ben says that all women need to learn to be humble in the presence of their leaders, and good wives are examples of how God wants us to behave, even when we have to be punished. Previously I have shown Domestic Discipline to be both a Biblical concept as well as a historical practice amongst husbands for thousands of years on my Instagram page @biblicalsexandiscipline and on my blog Biblicalgenderroles.com as well as podcasts series on BGRLearning.com. Feminism and egalitarianism everywhere-everytime are very new concepts. Rock showed the stars and you looked at the finger. When we got there he told me that he was fed up with the way I was behaving and I was going to be punished right then. Julie Anne, like Daisy, you too are filtering the Bible through experiences as well as using a logical non-sequiter. Are these threats real? Do not expect her to be silent through this experience though. And no, the experiences, however bad, do not nullify the word of God. Sis has been married 3 times already, and bro is still married, but is miserable as his wife treats him the same as mom treats dad. This 3. 1986)., Yeah, it even helps to read an interlinear every now and then and do a bit of Greek/Hebrew study. Im sure not everyone will agree with me, but in light of common sense and Jesus character, its what makes sense to me. Yes, I believe there is a cut off line as to how old a child should be when he gets a spanking though. Oh, come on, JA; Daisy of course speaks for all of us, which is why Daisy debates many of us, I believe myself included. You are free to live this lifestyle. If he gets tired of his dominatrix, he needs to move out. So while I believe that Biblically speaking, married couples do have a great amount of freedom in how and when they make love, that does not extend to humiliation and injury. Even when we get punished when we think we didnt do anything wrong we cant be disobedient. How come society thinks women arent bright enough to dial 911? It looks sort of like leadership to those who have never seen the real thing. I have a lot of respect for your father, and husband. Its in the Lords Prayer as well: forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. Ive dated a few, been engaged to one. Change). After a while I learned that this was really Gods plan for the household and wanted it for myself when I was married. 13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. My parents were a little surprised at first but I think they see spanking as not the same as abuse. And being insulting doesnt either. Christianity is about inspiring free hearts, not forcing them with laws. How are you doing now? Change), You are commenting using your Facebook account. Young girls will also learn from the behavior and may find themselves with abusive men because of familiarity. What a heartless bunch. I was engaged to a man for several years. Wife Spanking, Christian Domestic Discipline, Domestic Violence *** You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. Christian Domestic Discipline / Spencer Respect and Submission in domestic discipline Respect and Submission are of particular importance in a marriage because the standard marriage vows for the bride always included the phrase to love, honor and obey her husband. Now, I am not condoning what happened to Lauren, because it appears she was not consenting. Thank you, Serving. Now, some Christian ladies are happy to accept the term feminism and apply it to themselves, so long as it is defined as something like the belief that women are equal to men and should be treated with respect by all. States have laws restricting consent to marry a person who is already married. Ill critique whatever you are making public. Jennas Punishment Spanking (Christian Domestic Discipline Marriage #1) During a disagreement, Jenna storms out of the house without telling her husband where she's going. I cant imagine anyone here wants 100pinkapples to suffer from her trauma forever. Many want a "guide", a manual to show them how to do it. Dad took off my slacks and panties and handed the strap to my husband. You said, Eph 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Ok, so this is more widespread than I suspected if its crossing over into charismatic churches. Jamin was holding up his left hand and motioning his right hand into his left hand as he explained [redacted] actions. If Satan can keep you in the past, he will rob you of your future. This is not some sort of dark movement where people are held in chains in basements. are not healthy in a relationship. As a strong-willed person, I see submission as a form of feminine chivalry. Elijah did not begin by being arrogant, dogmatic, self-congratulating and dismissive (like you have been in this discussion). This bullying is a means to exploitation, like most bullying. Cooler heads prevail and your words are so helpful, not just for A Lone Voice, but to anyone else who may stumble across this old thread. The whole verse says: 1Cor 7:4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. And it goes on: 1Cor 7:5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. You should address your own problems before aspiring to protect people against themselves. Its a logical progression. My daughters and I attend Sunday school that our pastor does for all the women who get spanked when they are bad. And helpful. I agree with you also but I dont agree on what some people say about pastors Spanking other peoples wives and brothers Spanking their sisters and son spanking their mothers I mean that just Blows my mind away right there I think if its between a husband and his wife only then whatever floats their boat more power to them, Ruth, how old are you? I had my hands up and she walks into me. Jamin was not told about the allegations made against him by [redacted] to me. and going through Judges 4:9 all the way to Eph 5:23 and 1Tim 2:12). Anne Garboczi Evans, that is terrible! But he never swore, or acted out of control. [I then asked Lauren if shed be willing to share her story anonymously.]. You cannot say you respect and love an adult when you treat them like a child and all these women who are letting their husbands hit them you cant love yourself. I am now 24 years old and my husband is 27. You are interpreting the Scriptures in error, just as the Pharisees did. My brothers were never spanked after the age of 13 but we girls were spanked by dad followed by an hour of corner time bare bottomed in the living room just like Mom until we got married. Church youth group leaders would tell young ladies that modest is hottest and make it clear that exposing any kind of skin somehow made a woman loose or of a certain kind. My parents had total veto power over what I could wear. I had numerous discussions with people that wanted to begin or improve their Christian Domestic Discipline relationship. This is the reason tolerance is essential if you want your ideas to pass the test of time. Then, they sign this document in the presence of lawyers, and witnesses (friends and/or parents of the woman).
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